Saturday, February 10, 2007

Well, here we are, 11 months ago, with Rodney: THE stud muffin of yoga. Liv is there now, enjoying his every move, and I am here, being jealous! Have fun, liv!
I love this picture, love looking back on 11 months ago and knowing now all that we didn't know then. We were still relatively new friends, although I have to say, liv is one of those people I feel like I have known for a long time--family that just didn't meet until later. We were both married, albeit not necessarily happily, and neither one of us had a clue that within less than a year we would be divorced (or almost there). For me, there was very little hope that my marriage would be "ok", but a great determination to "stick it out and make the best of it". I really had no idea that within 3 months I would be telling my husband that it was over. I am amazed at how different I am now from the person in this picture, and how very much my life has changed in 11 months. Not just job changes, but life changes. I did it. I broke free. I am facing my fears and learning just what I am capable of doing. For the first time in my life I am alone. And I am making it. And my kids are better: happy, more secure, able to enjoy each of us as parents instead of having to take sides or worrying about what was going to happen next. And my ex is better. He is creating a life for himself, and he is so much better with the kids now that he--not me-- is responsible for his relationship with them. Accountablilty is a good thing. Its amazing how your life can change in a year, or a moment.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

What a nice photo! And post. I love what you had to say.

Susanne said...

It's so amazing, when on looks back just a tiny year and everything has changed. Especially if on feels better than before.

lu said...

It's a lesson in how to look back and see things-even the bad things from a positive perspective; I'm going to try to do that today- spin positive. Good lesson.

You and Liv are beautiful, inside and out.

Liv said...

yes, and he did too wear the same shirt this year. we could literally say that that photo is from every year we attended the nashville workshop.

i think the scary part of that photo is that during that time, i thought my marital relationship was on the mend. also, it pains me to see how tired and post partum-ly fat i was. ewwww...

that trip will always stick out in my mind as a good one- even if we didn't fulfill our country music dreams.