How do you fill the hours?
I was reading a favorite blog of mine and in it she mentioned that "I sabotage my own weekends without the boys, I don't plan well..." It made me think. Why is it that the weekends without my kids are my least productive and least appreciated?
Its not that I don't have tons of things I need to do. A thousand things I "wish I had time for".
The minute the kids are off my plate I just freeze up. Wander around aimlessly and pitter away the hours. Its as if my brain can't function unless I am planning my life around theirs. Or is that just an excuse?
I have to get used to this "alone" time. Be comfortable with who I am and what I do with myself. Maybe I need to make plans to fill the hours--at first at least. Until I get used to it. I am determined to make my time with ME be quality time. God knows I whine enough about not having time--I need to start appreciating the time I do have, and the company I keep. Even if that company is just ME.
I was reading a favorite blog of mine and in it she mentioned that "I sabotage my own weekends without the boys, I don't plan well..." It made me think. Why is it that the weekends without my kids are my least productive and least appreciated?
Its not that I don't have tons of things I need to do. A thousand things I "wish I had time for".
The minute the kids are off my plate I just freeze up. Wander around aimlessly and pitter away the hours. Its as if my brain can't function unless I am planning my life around theirs. Or is that just an excuse?
I have to get used to this "alone" time. Be comfortable with who I am and what I do with myself. Maybe I need to make plans to fill the hours--at first at least. Until I get used to it. I am determined to make my time with ME be quality time. God knows I whine enough about not having time--I need to start appreciating the time I do have, and the company I keep. Even if that company is just ME.
PS: off to Space Camp with the youngest--back Wednesday!
9 comments:
I think it is just a question of getting used to it. Maybe set yourself a specfic task each time and do it, after awhile perhaps your time will be more productive.
Our children really define us don't they?
ps. What horrifying dreams you mentioned over my way. Poor kid.
I have a special needs daughter that keeps me busy from morning til night. This year she will move into a group home and I wonder how I will manage without her schedule to keep my grounded. It scares me and excites me at the same time.
I know how you feel, without a deadline, I don't get a lot done. I think it's a matter of relearning how to schedule yourself. Who knows? I guess I'll see.
I came from crazymumma.
My theory is that the more you have to do, the more you do. On weekends when the kids are away, you go from working, single mom. to just single. You're used to having a dozen balls in the air and suddenly you are only in charge of yourself. I bet you'll keep yourself busy with all that packing you have to do! The best time to purge and pack a kid's room is when they aren't there!
It's a hard transistion, when the circus sunddenly leaves and your house is all quiet and empty.
I bet planning would help. Dinner with friends, big house project to make you feel like you really accomplished something.
But sometimes just hanging around being lonesome is all we can manage.
I don't think it's all that important to be "productive" all the time. Sitting and being quiet is just as important as being constantly in motion.
Peace,
~chani
Hey Ellie,
You totally nailed what it is like, the aimlessness and pittering away without the kids.
I'm looking forward to the days when I can become productive and at ease being alone.
I know what you mean. When my husband isn't at home I spend all the time he is away waiting for him to return. When my son isn't there it's easier because I'm more used to it.
And you will too.
Following my usual daily structure helps.
Maybe the pittering feels good? Maybe you're recharging. Do you feel recharged?
Just wondering.. how you doin', Ellie? :)
Peace,
~Chani
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